I Married the Ruthless and Coldhearted Hero Under Royal Decree, But Something Feels Off [R-18]

Title: I Married the Ruthless and Coldhearted Hero Under Royal Decree, But Something Feels Off

Original: 王命で冷徹非情と言われる英雄に嫁いだけれど、何だか違うようです

Author: 桜月みやこ

Link: https://novel18.syosetu.com/n6866hl/

Even if there’s no love between us from the start, I want to marry someone with which we can think about each other and gently develop our love from there—

Despite her meager wish, Juliana, the daughter of the Duke, was married to Evet due to a royal decree, the country’s hero who was said to be cold and ruthless.

The two didn’t meet until the wedding day. On their first night together, there was no conversation between her and Evet, who seemed to be in a bad mood since the ceremony.

“This smell is…”

“Tha, that’s, a little bit of scented oil… Do you not like it…”

“No, it’s just like Lady Juliana, it’s fresh and sweet—it’s a nice scent”

‘He=he’s sniffing me…!?’

“Nose, breathe through your nose.”

“I’m not, I’m not used to it yet.”

“If you were used to it, I would have had to tear the other guy apart.”

“Eh…”

The hero I married seems to be quite different from what I thought—?

---

“Juliana, a marriage proposal has come for you.”

I clasped my hands at those words from my father. The time had finally come. I, Juliana Clarkson, was the daughter of a duke. I have a capable older brother, so there are no issues with succession. It’s my role as a daughter to have a good marriage.

I’d been ready to accept any marriage, but due to the turmoil of recent years—a war breaking out due to deteriorating relations with the neighboring country—I’d remained single until the present age of twenty-two. I’m not sure if it’s completely because of the conflict, but there are many girls who haven’t been able to marry even though they’ve come of age.

“Who is my fiancé?”

Who is he? What is he like? Even though I’d prepared myself, I was still quite nervous. If I can be honest about my preferences, I’d like someone not too old and slim. I’d also like him to have a full head of hair. If it’s alright for me to be greedy, then I’d like someone whom I can nurture a gentle affection with even if that love isn’t a grand affair between man and woman.

When my father spoke his name, however, I froze. “I’m sorry, father, may I ask you to repeat yourself…?”

“Marquis Kaiser—Evet Kaiser—who’s been called the Hero of Salvation since the recent war.

“Lord Evet Kaiser…” I repeated, dazed.

Father sighed and rubbed his eyes. “From my perspective, though, if you’d rather refuse, I’ll be alright with it.”

“…Refuse? How could I do that?” I asked fearfully, only for my father to let out a small snort.

“It’s a royal decree—”

“Then I’m afraid I cannot refuse…”

“But, if I bring up that story from twenty-two years ago, oh, or that one from twenty-six years ago…” Father mumbled with a serious expression.

I blinked. “I’d be very interested in hearing about the story which can threaten even His Majesty, the King.” (Father and His Majesty had been best friends ever since they were young.) Although I’m happy he’s willing to go toe-to-toe with the King, I think that we’d better not.

Though, I’m not quite sure what to make of this situation. A marriage between a duke’s daughter and a war hero by royal decree… Perhaps this arrangement is a reward for the hero that saved our nation?

I’m not sure I should be evaluated so highly for simply being a duke’s daughter, but it’s true that I have a leg up. In any case, this arrangement was nearly too high an honor. I’d be thrilled at marrying such a person. That is if his title was just “Hero of Salvation.” In other words, if it hadn’t been for the “cold-hearted” and “ruthless” epithets that preceded his moniker.

I’d heard that Lord Evet was terrifying on the battlefield. He’d cut down soldiers from the neighboring country without a shred of mercy. Even his own allies trembled at the sight of him. He was a marquis who guarded the border, so he rarely left his domain due to tensions with the neighboring countries. Due to this, his personality was not well known in social circles. That said, it’s unlikely that his personality changes that drastically on the battlefield, so I imagine that he’s cold-hearted and ruthless on the regular.

Ah, goodbye married life I’d so longed for.

No, Lord Evet is only twenty-eight years old. In other words, only six years older than myself.

I’d only ever seen him from a distance at the victory celebration, but I don’t remember him being particularly round. If he’s a swordsman then he must have quite solid muscle, now that I think about it. From a distance, there wasn’t anything wrong with his hair either.

In the face of such favorable conditions, I had little to complain about. I suppose the only lost cause is hoping for a partner I could nurture a peaceful and loving relationship with.

　

“While I don’t know if I’m worthy of marrying the hero of our nation…” I took a deep breath and curtsied before my father, “…I respectfully accept His Majesty’s decree.”

Everything happened rather quickly from there. Preparations were made in short order and soon the day of the wedding had arrived. Lord Evet never visited me before the ceremony, so it was only on the day itself that we met face-to-face.

He was handsome with strong features. I’d expected him to look somewhat bearlike, but his face was terribly handsome. I was tempted to gawk at him during the ceremony, but years of etiquette training prevented me from doing so. The ice-blue color of his eyes made them look even sharper, and there were stress lines forming between his eyebrows.

Normally, this would be a couple’s happy beginning, but Lord Evet’s eyebrows were pinched together. He looked unhappy the entire time. In fact, he looked so aggrieved that you’d be forgiven for forgetting that it was his wedding.

Those who attended the ceremony looked at me with such sympathy that it was almost laughable.

Nevertheless, he kissed me for our vows—albeit, on the forehead—and after the ceremony, he took me by the hand and escorted me to our carriage. I relaxed a little at this, realizing that at least I wouldn’t be disrespected in public.

The wrinkles betwixt his eyebrows were on full display during the ride to the Marquis’ estate in the royal capital. It’s good that I was skilled in reading the mood. It felt as if his whole being was rejecting me; it felt that he’d shoot daggers at me if I tried speaking to him.

In the end, I just stared at my hands-firmly placed in my lap the entire time- as the carriage rocked back to my new home.

I was worried that the servants of the mansion would also be cold to me, but I received a surprisingly warm welcome. After being introduced to the head maid and several servants, I took the butler’s advice to leave the details for tomorrow as I was tired. I relaxed in the room that I was given.

Dinner with Lord Evet ended in silence. Then, with the help of Louisa—a maid who had come with me from my parents’ house—I took a warm bath and got ready for bed.

“Good luck!” Louisa said as I saw her off. After aimlessly wandering the room for a moment, I sat at the foot of the bed. I didn’t know what to do, so I fiddled with the hem of my nightgown, which was a thin, semi-transparent cloth.

Tonight is my wedding night. I’ll be doing that with Lord Evet…

I’m not sure that I’ll be able to do a good job, so I can’t help but be nervous. No matter how long I waited, however, Lord Evet didn’t show up. I remembered how upset he looked, and the possibility that he might not even come occurred to me.

That’s when the bedroom door slowly opened.

“…Lord Evet…” I wasn’t sure if I was nervous or relieved at the sight of him.

“I’m sorry I’m late.”

—He spoke! It might not be as dire as I thought.

It was the first time that I’d heard his voice. It was lower and calmer than expected. His brows were no longer furrowed, but the moment his gaze met mine his expression reverted. Lord Evet walked towards me with his long legs, his expression exactly the same as when he had touched my shoulder.

“You’re cold.”

“Eh?”

The wrinkles between his brows deepened and somehow, I found myself in Lord Evet’s arms. “You shouldn’t wear such thin clothing.”

“Ah, I’m sorry… I wasn’t sure what to do…”

“…Next time just wait under the covers.”

Just as I was thinking about the words “next time”, Lord Evet buried his face in my neck. “Hya…!” I jumped in surprise but was hugged tighter by Lord Evet.

“What is that scent?” He murmured, his face still buried in my neck. I was reminded that Louisa had put some perfume on me before retiring.

“Oh, um, do you not like the scented oil?”

“No. It smells like Lady Juliana—fresh with the hint of sweetness—it’s a nice scent.”

I wasn’t sure that you’d like it… Or that I’d be sniffed by you! I managed to swallow back the scream of surprise as Lord Evet removed himself from me.

“May I call you… Juliana?”

“Y-yes…!” I’m not sure what to make of this situation. His face looks so gentle.

The corners of his mouth lifted just a little and his eyes narrowed slightly, but this would definitely be called a smile. I looked up at Lord Evet in disbelief as his face approached mine. It was the first time that I’d seen a man’s face so close to mine.

“…Kiss…” I murmured,thinking that was what was happening, but then Lord Evet’s fingers gently traced my lips.

“Would you dislike that?” He stroked my cheek as he asked this. His hand was so warm that I let out a small breath of relief.

“No.”

“Then, may I continue?”

“…Yes.”

Lord Evet’s lips slowly approached mine again. This time I closed my eyes in anticipation. I didn’t know when I’d get to breathe again, so I took a deep breath to ready myself.

…Except, did he just laugh?

When I looked to see what kind of expression he was wearing, I saw that the corners of his mouth were raised slightly just like before. “Breathe through your nose,” he whispered to me before our lips came together.

My gaze met his and he held it as if to encourage me.

“…!” I closed my eyes tightly and took a small breath through my nose as I was told. Then Lord Evet changed his angle. I managed to breathe, but the repeated kisses eventually wore me down. I turned my face away and slumped my shoulders apologizing to Lord Evet who seemed to be waiting for me to catch my breath. “I’m sorry, I’m not really used to this…” I looked at Lord Evet fearfully, wondering if he’d be upset that I couldn’t even kiss properly.

Lord Evet’s brows furrowed again. “If you were, I’d have ripped the other guy to shreds.”

“Huh…”

“You’ll just have to get used to it from now on.”

I thought I’d heard something disturbing just now, but then my cheek was stroked and my lips were stolen once again. That’s when he slowly pushed me down. “Nnn…ah…” Lord Evet’s hand slid over my thin nightgown.

“Are you feeling it from the kiss?” He asked. He said that I would get used to it from now on and as if backing up his words, he kissed me over and over again—shallowly and deeply—until I was limp. A sensation struck me sharply causing me to jump a little.

“Lord Evet…”

“It’s like you’re telling me to eat you right up.”

“…Hya! N-no…” I’m not sure what to make of this situation. “L-lord Evet… Wait…”

“I can’t wait.”

As I tried to slip up and escape, my body was suddenly held down, and I felt the tip of my breasts being licked through the thin cloth of my dress.

And as my nipples continued to be caressed and pinched, I felt unable to suppress my voice, which ended up spilling out of my mouth–

“Ah… Lord Evet! Ah… N-no!”

“There’s no way I’d be able to resist now, hearing such a cute voice…”

After muttering something, Lord Evet then bit the ribbon tying my nightgown together, and, without hesitation, quickly untied it.

“Ah…!”

My nightgown fluttered open, exposing the upper half of my body.

With now only my underwear hiding my body, I tried to quickly tie it together again out of shame. However, Lord Evet was quick to catch my hands before I was able to do it.

“Please, let me see your body.”

“B-But… I’m embarrassed…”

“It’s okay.”

Without giving me enough time to ask, “What do you mean ‘it’s okay’?”, Lord Evet coldly untied the ribbon holding my underwear in place

“Sorry, but I don’t think I can afford to hold back now.”

“Huh!? Ah…!!”

Just as both my nightgown and underwear were stripped off in a flash and dropped onto the floor, Lord Evet quickly opened my legs, burying his face between them.

And barely leaving me enough time to wonder “What happened?”, I then felt something slimy crawling inside me.

“Ah…! What is this…!?”

I was so scared that I tried to close my legs, but Lord Evet, with his face buried between them, just opened them more, forcing a scream out of me.

As a wet sound reverberated in the room, a sensation I had never felt before ran through my whole body.

And it was then that I finally understood that what had been crawling inside me, making a watery sound, inside that spot which I myself had never even touched, was nothing but Lord Evet’s tongue―he was licking me down there.

“Lord Evet…! No…! Please stop…!”

But no matter how much I appealed, Lord Evet would not stop. On the contrary, the watery sound from before had only become more and more intense.

“Ah… Ahhh…! S-stop! Ah!?”

I then suddenly felt a stimulus so strong that I couldn’t help but twitch my body in reaction to it.

“This place too, it’s gotten so swollen up…”

“No…! N-not there…!”

I kept twitching each time Lord Evet stroked his fingers there.

In my confusion, not knowing what exactly was happening, I kept crying and pleading Lord Evet to stop, and it was finally then that Lord Evet backed his face from there, moving his body up.

Lord Evet then licked his lips and wiped his mouth roughly, and I immediately felt a sudden rush in my stomach.

“Evet—”

I tried to call him but couldn’t finish the sentence.

A tingling pain suddenly ran through the place where I was being licked up until now.

“Nngh!”

“Ah, it really is still too tight.”

I felt something slowly being inserted into me.

As I realized what had been slowly creeping inside me and making a sticky noise was Lord Evet’s finger, I was able to relax my body slightly, which had been very stiff from the tension up until now.

A bit of pain rushed from my insides, from having Lord Evet insert two fingers inside me. However, he was quick to recognize it,  kissing me there and occasionally caressing the protruding part of my inner areas in an up-down motion, making me again feel a strong sensation. And whenever he did this, I could feel something sticky beginning to flow out of me, with the pain becoming less and less intense as time went on—

At that point, I had sunk limply into the bed at the mercy of Lord Evet’s fingers. Then, as I slowly opened my eyes, I saw Lord Evet taking off the clothes he had just been clad in.

“…Your scars…”

There were scars of all kinds and sizes, all over his muscular, robust body.

“All you have to do is close your eyes.”

I shook my head in negation at hearing such a thing come out of his mouth, and then tilted my neck slightly, touching his body and his scars.

“This is proof that… You’ve been bravely protecting our country… Protecting us. They are very, very precious… Kyaaa!?”

He then suddenly hugged me, muttering “sorry,”  and making me scream in surprise.

“Juliana!”

—I’m alive.

“Juliana, I’m so sorry.”

—Yes, I’ve heard that a couple of times.

“Juliana, are you alright.

—I don’t think so…

Right after I’d touched Lord Evet’s scar, I’d been hit with a tremendous amount of pain. When I’d cried out in confusion because it hurt so much, Lord Evet apologized, but the pain didn’t abate. He said he couldn’t take it anymore and continued.

I realized that this pain was because my body had been exposed by Lord Evet. When he noticed that I was unable to breathe properly due to pain and confusion, he’d stopped moving. Just when I’d regained my ability to breathe, he’d started up again. When I’d started being able to feel a sensation that was different from pain, Lord Evet came inside me.

…And now, I lay there limp with Lord Evet hugging me. It seemed he wouldn’t let me go. “I’m sorry” and “Are you alright?” was being asked nonstop. It seemed that he was really worried about me…

As I slowly looked up at Lord Evet, his ice-blue eyes immediately caught mine. His turbulent breathing and erratic heart rate seemed to be calming down.

“Juliana.” His expression didn’t change much, but I could see that his eyebrows were lowered just a little. His ice-blue eyes wavered, so I smiled thinking that he must really be worried about me.

“It was very painful at first, but…”

Lord Evet’s brows wrinkled as I began.

“But towards the middle, you were very gentle, so it’s… It’s okay.”

The wrinkles between his eyebrows deepened before he hugged me again. “I’m sorry.”

—Ah, I think I understand now.

That furrowed brow doesn’t always signify anger or discomfort… Or negative emotions.

“Lord Evet, we’re not husband and wife… Right?” Not just a couple married in name only, who had spoken empty vows, but a couple in name and reality. As I tried to confirm this, I felt the arms around me tighten.

—Oh, with this person, perhaps it’s no longer a dream.

We might be able to care for each other and nurture a gentle affection. We might be able to become a proper family. That thought made me so happy that I gently put my arms around Lord Evet’s back and whispered, “my husband.”

“—What?”

“Hiii!”

Instantly that deep, low voice returned and I felt my breath catch in my throat as Lord Evet’s arms held me with much more strength than before.

“What did you say…?” He asked in a low voice. My body and mind instantly froze.

“M-my husband…”

“H-husband…”

Oh! I was so wrong about an affectionate relationship and peaceful home. I hurriedly said my apologies, wondering if I was about to be thrown out of the bedroom for being too conceited. “I’m so sorry, Lord Evet, I…”

“Again.”

“…What?”

Lord Evet’s arms loosened around me and he grasped my shoulders this time. “Say it again.”

“What…? Oh, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…” Perhaps I hadn’t apologized enough. I started to look for words other than “sorry” to apologize to Lord Evet but he shook his head.

“Your husband,” he said.

“Yes…”

“Call me your husband once more.”

“M-my husband…?” Confused, I did what I was told and said it.

“…Again.”

“My husband…”

Lord Evet let out a sigh and hugged me tightly. “It’s like a dream…”

“What…?”

“To be able to marry Juliana and have her call me husband…” Lord Evet let go of my body. It was a little lonely without the warmth. “I’ve spoken to you once… At the castle before the war began.”

“At the castle?” I blinked at the sudden mention but thought back to the few times when I’d visited the place. Had there been an evening ball? Or perhaps it was the Queen’s tea party that I’d been invited to with my mother. No, but there hadn’t been any men there.

“I’m not sure you remember. It was a very short meeting, but I fell in love with you at first sight.”

“What?” I looked up at Lord Evet in surprise, but he quickly averted his gaze.

“After the war broke out, people started calling me a hero, but I just wanted to protect you.”

“Me…?”

“I didn’t want to let them destroy the country where you lived. That’s all I wanted to protect, so I kept pushing forward.”

I wasn’t sure what to think. I just listened to his words in a daze.

“When His Majesty asked me for a prize, I thought that this was a good opportunity. I wanted you. But… You don’t deserve to be treated like this… What a selfish, terrible man I am.” He smiled self-deprecatingly and got up from the bed. “I was sure you’d refuse. That’s why I was terrified when I’d heard that His Majesty had used a royal decree. No young woman would otherwise marry a man known for his cold-heartedness and ruthlessness. I’m sure you must have been terrified. I couldn’t even go see you. Then, at the ceremony you were so beautiful and dazzling I was sure I’d be blinded. I swore that I would take good care of you, but you were so lovely that I couldn’t hold back. I was too rough with you.”

I stared at the back of Lord Evet’s head as he spoke so eloquently. Had he liked me before? Was it because he thought that I was frightened of him that he never came to see me? It was all because he was worried about me?

While I tried to sort out my thoughts, Lord Evet apologized again. He picked up his gown and put it on before heading towards the door.

That’s when I hurriedly called out to him who was about to leave. “Lord Evet… My husband.”

Lord Evet’s shoulders flinched.

“My husband, to be honest with you, I thought that this marriage would be cold and lonely. I’d heard that Lord Evet was a man said to be cold and ruthless. He was a man that didn’t even come see me until the day of our wedding and he looked terrifying the entire time.”

“…I’m sorry…”

“But when I heard my husband’s voice here in this room for the first time, when I felt your warmth, my mind changed.”

“…What…?”

I let out a sigh of relief when I noticed that Lord Evet had turned back to look at me. As I sat up, a wrinkle appeared between his eyebrows. It must be out of concern.

“I just wanted the best for my family, so I was prepared to accept anyone as my partner, but I have always been dreaming. I’ve been wishing for a person with whom I could nurture an affection, even if we weren’t in love. If it was Lord Evet, then perhaps we could build such a wonderful household.”

“Juliana…” His brow unfurrowed and his expression changed into one of surprise.

“My husband, may I love you too? Is it okay to think of my husband as my number one…?”

Don’t go. Come back and hold me. It was with such a wish that I held out my hand towards Lord Evet. He hesitated for a moment before coming back and hugging me gently as if he were afraid to hurt me.

“…Is this a dream, I wonder.”

“Well, it wasn’t a dream. In fact, it was quite painful, so please don’t pass it off as a dream.” I returned his embrace, and he groaned before burying his face into my shoulder.

“…I love you, my dear. I don’t know if I can give you the kind of sweet family that you desire.” I let go, and Lord Evet inhaled. “Juliana. Will you be my wife… And family?” He looked at me with an extremely serious expression and I shivered slightly.

I wonder if his eyebrows will furrow again if I say that he got the order wrong. I wonder what his expression would be. It was with this in mind that I ignored the pain in my lower body and hugged Lord Evet. “Yes, Lord Evet. My husband. Please take care of me for many years to come.” I rubbed my cheek against his gown, and Lord Evet grunted.

“I’m sorry, but can we go once more?”

I felt something hot and hard press against my stomach. It was a little scary remembering the pain that I’d felt earlier, but I reached out and touched the crease between Lord Evet’s eyebrows and smiled. “Yes, my husband… Cut if you can then please be gentle this time.”

“I’ll… I’ll try my best.”

​​Lord Evet took his gown off again and started slowly inserting himself in me which caused the semen that he had just released inside me to squeeze out with a wet sound.

“Ah… It’s coming out.”

“I’ll pour more into you again.”

Having now put everything inside me, Lord Evet let out a gasp in distress.

And then he slowly started moving.

With each time that Lord Evet pushed in and out of me, I could hear a watery sound, probably because of the semen he had left in me.

This somehow left me very embarrassed, and I shook my head slightly, causing Lord Evet to stop moving.

“Does it hurt?”

“Ngh… N-no… It’s the… It’s the sound…”

I then complained that I was embarrassed, and Lord Evet laughed a little.

The corners of his mouth turned up a little, and he narrowed his eyes a bit, but that was it.

“You’ll get used to it soon enough.”

“…Like kissing?”

“Have you gotten used to kissing already?”

“No, not yet…”

I lifted my chin a bit, asking him to slow things down, but Lord Evet responded with just a light kiss, and then slowly started moving again.

“Ngh…”

As I struggled to keep my voice from coming out, Lord Evet dropped another light kiss on me.

“Don’t hold back your voice.”

“B-but… Ah! Ahhh!”

Without leaving me a chance to complain that I was embarrassed, Lord Evet’s movements caused my voice to overflow again, which reverberated in the room together with the watery sounds from before.

As Lord Evet started to move faster, the wet sounds became louder, as did my voice. I was still embarrassed, but accelerating even more in a teasing way, Lord Evet quickly blew my embarrassment far away.

“My love… Ah… Ahh!”

“Juliana… Juliana!”

And as Lord Evet started moving even faster, the sound of our bodies colliding against each other also joined in with the other sounds from before.

And now there were wet sounds, my voice, Lord Evet’s breathing, the sound of his voice occasionally leaking out, and the creaking of the bed ― all these sounds mixed together, blending into one.

“Ah! This… This feels so good! My love, my love!”

The pain had by now been long gone, and every time Lord Evet moved it had me feeling as if I was slowly melting away.

“I’m sorry, Juliana… Let me be a bit rougher for just a moment.”

Lord Evet raised my waist, moving my legs way up, and then started vigorously slamming his hips into me.

“Ah! Ah! Ahhh, love… Ahhh…!”

I felt like I was in pain.

But I also felt like I was feeling good.

I had asked him to be slow and gentle, but he now seemed to have forgotten all about it, tossing me all around and making my voice overflow even more.

“One more time.”

—Doing it once was not enough for him.

He sought me many, many times that night, entering me again and again.

My memory was gone by the time I woke up the next morning. Perhaps I had passed out during the night.

And as soon as I opened my eyes, I was greeted by Lord Evet profusely apologizing to me.

While it was very embarrassing to say it out loud, I told him that everything was okay, as I had felt so good last night. Lord Evet replied by saying that he was sorry, and then for some reason started doing me again…

He didn’t let me go out until about noon when Luisa apologetically knocked on the door.

After that, I spent the afternoon in my room relaxing—lounging around, knowing that in the evening Lord Evet would wish for me again.

The plan was to leave tomorrow during the day, that is, two days after the wedding, departing from the townhouse in the royal capital and then returning to the Marquess of Kaizer’s castle. However, that had actually gotten postponed by three days—a fact I learned only upon arriving at the Marquess’ castle.

As the rumors that “the cold-blooded and emotionless hero of the nation” had been getting along so well with his wife went around, he ended up having his crown taken,becoming only a “hero of the nation”.

At the time, however, I had absolutely no clue that such a thing had taken place, and thus I continued to live happily with my husband—a husband who was close to my age, handsome, muscular, possessing a crown of exuberant hair, and, above all else, one who gave me so much love that I felt as if I was about to drown in it.